


Connecting the Dots

by Treeni



Series: Tag Teaming [1]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Friendship, Hijinks & Shenanigans, M/M, Meddling, Other, Pining, Sympathetic Dark Sides (Sanders Sides), cursing
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-26
Updated: 2021-01-03
Packaged: 2021-03-04 02:48:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 19,444
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24926407
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Treeni/pseuds/Treeni
Summary: Tag TeamingA formatted series in which the first chapter is always dedicated to a platonic friendship between two sides and the rest of the story is one of them takes it upon themselves to help the other one out in the love department.Aka the series were literally everyone meddles in everyone's love lives until they're all happy beans.Tag Teaming Part 1: Connecting the DotsLogan was in love. Virgil was certain of it.OrIn which Virgil meddles.
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders & Logic | Logan Sanders, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders, Deceit | Janus Sanders & Morality | Patton Sanders, Logic | Logan Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders, Platonic Virgil and Logan
Series: Tag Teaming [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1803961
Comments: 24
Kudos: 42





	1. An Agreement of Change

**Author's Note:**

  * For [peachsneakers](https://archiveofourown.org/users/peachsneakers/gifts).



> This series is officially dedicated to peachsneakers for helping inspire me again. If you haven't read their works, you need to, they're awesome! Unfortunately, university made writing anything outside of assignments difficult as they alone kept me busy. It's hard to justify writing a fanfic when you have twenty pages due in your creative writing class. 
> 
> I swear, the woes of majoring in English.
> 
> Glad that's over.
> 
> *Graduate school looms in the distance*

Since the peace agreement between the sides, Virgil felt movie night had been a resounding success, surprisingly enough. It was Patton’s suggestion in the beginning as a way to try and bring everyone together, well it was technically his second attempt. Initially he had suggested a board game night, but it was quickly decided there was still too much hostility between the sides, and they were collectively far too competitive for that to go well quite yet. In truth, the light sides often struggled to keep things civil even between the four of them, adding Janus’ tactics and Remus’ chaos at this point could only result in trouble. Even movie night had its hiccups in the beginning.

Virgil found himself thinking first to the twins who both occupied the floor this evening on either side of the coffee table. Remus slouched against both Patton and Janus’s knees with his feet sprawled out under the coffee table. Roman tucked himself neatly with his tablet on his knees as he leaned delicately against the arm of the couch near Logan.

Settling the twins had been a struggle at the start. Roman had trouble focusing on unfamiliar content, yet Remus struggled to focus on anything he’d seen before and would loudly complain of boredom. Unfortunately, the films that Roman had seen, and Remus had not were quickly depleted and the group had to find other options. Surprisingly of the two, Remus was the one who was easier to find a solution for. Patton and Janus made an effort to provide extra snacks during movie night because the darker creativity was fine so long as he had something to munch on. Logan tried giving him chewelry once, but after Remus nommed through it as if it were as edible as any other snack, Patton insisted on sticking with things that were meant to be eaten. Roman was a little harder to find a solution for. The problem with new content and Roman was that it was invariably inspiring to him and he needed an immediate outlet for ideas, notes, and questions. They had originally tried giving him a notebook due to their collective decision to ban electronics (they were supposed to be paying attention to the movies and each other after all), but an allocation was made for a small drawing tablet with internet access, so long as he kept the brightness down and the sound on mute. The device allowed him to keep notes and quickly answer questions as they sprung to his head. Though the twins still tended to argue about what to watch and even what characters were the best, the two had made a lot of progress in the months since the arrangement had started.

The arguing had settled to more playful banter as Remus endlessly teased his brother, but usually gave Roman his way after he’d had his kicks. Likewise, Virgil knew for a fact that Roman kept a secret list of his brother’s requests and would occasionally ask for them on Remus’ behalf. Once Virgil even walked in on the brothers having a horror movie marathon of their own. Roman was in the midst of critiquing the subpar effects that “weren’t even scary” as Remus cackled beside him. The set on the coffee table they seemed to be working their way through was full of Remus’ favorites.

Also, on the topic of progress, Virgil had found himself slowly forgiving the deceitful side, in spite of himself. Even though he really didn’t want to. Virgil's baseline instinct drove him to remain suspicious of the known liar's motives. While he remained vigilant of what could come, the lack of any disasters and reassurances of the darksides' motives was making it increasingly difficult to stay angry at them. In the beginning, he and Janus were in a near constant state of argument with one another, but it quickly stopped being about Janus backstabbing one of the light sides and became more about petty things like not washing the dishes or who used the rest of the milk. Janus’ once biting insults slowly transformed into gentle teasing as time went on. More recently though, even the arguments had sort of just...stopped. Even now, as the sides all gathered in front of the television, Virgil glanced toward the snake and debated demanding back his favorite blanket that Janus had somehow appropriated, but the words stuck uncomfortably in Virgil's throat. Janus just looked so comfortable and peaceful. It was almost like an abstract and unfamiliar sight to the anxious side's eyes as he couldn’t recall even a single memory of Janus looking so at peace in all of their shared time in the subconscious. The snake was cuddled against Patton with an overloaded pile of at least five blankets and a mountain of pillows. He just looked so damn comfortable and pleased with himself. And really, who was Virgil to ruin that? Plus, with Patton and Janus growing closer as of late, there were many days Virgil woke up to the smell of breakfast cooking and found the two side by side in the kitchen working on the meal for six. Heck, even Patton had seemed to become more cheerful recently with the acquisition of a new friend and Virgil would not ruin it for him without a good reason.

He couldn’t do that.

Patton was trying so damn hard to make this work. Virgil refused to be the one to ruin it for him. Even if that meant trying to get along with the dark sides again.

At some point in Virgil’s pondering, the snake side seemed to have noticed the anxious side’s staring. Janus turned to Virgil with clear question in his heterochromatic eyes. Virgil just shook his head slightly to signal he had nothing to say. Janus grinned at him in return and blepped at Virgil with a smug look on his face as he burrowed further into his blanket nest. Virgil just rolled his eyes.

What a brat.

It was a wonder why he wasn’t called the dramatic side instead of the deceitful side. He could give Roman a run for his money as Drama King.

“Is everything alright?” Virgil heard, whispered from his right.

While Virgil was tucked into the corner of the couch, Logan sat on the other side of him, perched on the end of the L shaped couch, claiming the armrest.

“Everything’s fine Lo, just a little lost in thought,” Virgil replied and gently bumped his shoulder to Logan’s to show he meant it.

Logan set down the book he had been scribbling in on his lap and pivoted so he was turned toward Virgil. The logical side adjusted the glasses that had fallen down his nose as the night went on and stared hard at Virgil for a long moment, seemingly evaluating him and calculating the truth of his statement. Virgil didn’t miss Logan glancing Janus’ way to see if the snake had showed signs of picking up on any deception, but Janus’ attention was glued to the film for the moment.

“I trust you will let me know if any attacks begin or if you require anything,” Logan said, letting his shoulders relax finally. He tilted his head to the side and seemed to have a thought. “-And that you remember your breathing techniques, yes?”

“Okay dad,” Virgil joked.

“I thought that was Patton?” Logan said with a small snort.

“It’s whoever’s being the most overbearing at the time.”

Logan just hummed in response with a small smile, returning his hands to his notebook. Virgil could see Logan still watching him however from the corner of his eye. The anxious side couldn’t even find it in himself to be annoyed about it. When the dark sides emerged, Logan and Virgil had formed… well not quite an alliance per say… and they had been friends before of course, but the two had grown closer recently.

In the beginning, Virgil found he couldn’t go to Roman with his concerns about the darksides, because the creative side used them as fuel to start fights with Janus and Remus. He couldn’t go to Patton either because the fatherly side was already struggling so much just to make the situation work, anything Virgil wanted to say to him would likely have only stressed the emotional side out more. It was a difficult time for Patton as he seemed to ooze more anxiety than even Virgil as Patton’s emotions and morals were in opposition with one another. Virgil had even tried threatening the dark sides once, but Janus and Remus had only mocked him for his efforts and taunted the others more. It had the opposite effect that he had wanted and had made the transitory period even more difficult all around. After everything short of violence failed (though that was still absolutely on the table) he went to Logan. And honestly? Virgil regretted not going to him sooner. With inky eyeshadow streaked across his face and frustrated tears that just wouldn’t stop, Virgil had been led into Logan’s room without even an inquiry of why the anxious side was knocking on his door at two in the morning.

After getting Virgil settled into a comfortable position, Logan didn’t say a word as he waited patiently for Virgil to speak. It took a moment but speak he did. Suddenly, Virgil was spouting out about his time as a darkside, about being practically raised in the subconscious by Janus, about his time trying to scare Logan and the other sides into listening, and even about his fears about what Janus and Remus could do. Though Logan didn’t respond verbally, he kept eye contact and nodded encouragingly to show he was listening. As Virgil went on, anytime his breathing would hitch or increase, Logan subtly tapped a 4-7-8 pattern into the pulse point of his wrist. When Virgil had finally gotten it all out, everything that he had been keeping from them, all of his dark secrets that Virgil was certain they would all hate him for, banish him for, he started crying all over again.

Logan was never very good with emotions, but he tried. The logical side had barely opened his arms before Virgil crashed into him and sobbed. Logan questioned to the air if he should wake up Patton before the logical side simply hugged Virgil tighter and quietly muttered assurances to him, reminding him over and over again that he was accepted, important, and most of all: loved. Each whispered promise quietly fighting back against his worst fears because if Logan said it, it had to be true, right?

After calming down, Virgil pulled away enough to give Logan room to breathe. Virgil was surprised again to find no looks of frustration or ire behind Logan’s glasses, just a contemplative stare as the two readjusted. They had a long talk about the validity of multiple perspectives and voices. Logan explained his defense of Janus and Remus’ reemergence. That there would also inevitably be a time that Janus, Remus, or both would perspective on a situation that the others simply didn’t, that the two were both sides of Thomas and they ultimately wanted what was best for Thomas as much as the rest of them. He explained to Virgil that the separation was something that would eventually have to be overcome for Thomas’ mental health. Things simply couldn’t stand as it was forever without damaging repercussions. Logan reminded him that just because Remus and Janus offered Thomas advice, did not mean he was required to take it, but it was still worth taking the time to listen.

* * *

“Hear me out on this. I promise I am not doubting your judgement, I have something I want you to consider if you think you are comfortable enough to hear it,” Logan said, gently tapping Virgil’s fidgeting hands to reattain his attention.

Virgil let out a sigh, knowing he probably wouldn’t like where this is going. “Alright, lay it on me teach.”

“Early on, Roman, Patton, and even Thomas were terrified of your presence Virgil.”

Virgil snorted despite his own suddenly racing thoughts. “And you weren’t?”

“Okay, yes I will admit to having a certain amount of concern about your presence, but you have since shown to have a larger impact than any of us realized. On top of that, you have valuable insight that benefits Thomas, particularly in avoiding dangerous or damaging situations. You were once feared, but you proved that you did so much more than we first realized in our blindness. Can you not see how Janus and Remus’ situations mirror your own?”

Virgil didn’t respond right away, his mind started parting from the current conversation as every insult and biting remark he had thrown Logan’s way seemed to suddenly resurface. Logan clearly hadn’t forgotten how horrible he had once been to them. How could he have said those things? Logan was here being so nice to him and he just-oh god, oh god, oh god, he should go, he shouldn’t be here. He didn’t deserve it. He had been so horrible to them and-

“Virgil,” Logan said, with an authority in his tone as he took Virgil’s hands and went back to tapping the sequence in the anxious side’s wrist. “I promise you, no matter what happened in the past, I am your friend, and you are mine. It does not matter that you were a dark side. You matter. You matter to Thomas, you matter to Roman, you matter to Patton, and you matter to me. We love you. You are important to all of us, and not just for what you do, but for who you are Virgil.”

Virgil didn’t answer, his stare flicking widely between Logan and the door, even as he tried to match his breathing to Logan’s demonstration.

“Do you understand what I am saying?”

“Y-y-yes,” Virgil managed to mutter out.

“Do I need to get the others?”

“No...please no…” Virgil said, shaking his head.

Logan acquiesced after a moment and perched himself on his heels in front of the anxious side, seemingly resigned to stay in that position for a while. Once Virgil’s breathing calmed, Logan released one hand, to rub soothing circles into his shoulders.

“So…” Logan started, and waited until he caught Virgil’s eyes in his own deep blue and unwavering stare. “I need you to tell me who matters.”

“Loga-” Virgil started. He could feel his ears heating up as embarrassment took over as the primary emotion.

“Please Virgil, you are important to us. I need to know you understand me.” Logan said, with a humorless tone. “Now, what is important?”

Logan waited wordlessly with the same neutrally patient expression he wore when Virgil had first shown up as his door. At least it was clear that Virgil wasn’t being made fun of.

“I...I am,” Virgil forced out around the lump that had developed in his throat. Much more of this and he wasn’t sure he’d even be able to answer.

“Good,” Logan said with a small smile, like a teacher encouraging a student who had just started understanding a particularly difficult subject. “To whom?”

“To...to…everyone...I guess,” Virgil said, though it turned into a grumble toward the end.

Logan however wasn’t deterred as a rare soft look overcame his features at Virgil’s answer. “Exactly.”

Virgil was certain he could have died right then, buried in his own hoodie. If it had been anyone else staring down at him, he was certain he would have. However, Logan showed no judgement, no disgust, and no pity. He was just there, radiating with understanding and for the first time since entering the consciousness, Virgil felt safe.

* * *

Since that night, the two had gone out of their way for each other. Logan performed mental health checks with Virgil to check on his state of being. He had apparently gotten Patton’s help to make an emotion chart so Virgil could simply point to his general mood and what emotion he was feeling strongest and Logan would add it to a color coordinated tracker. He said he wanted to keep an eye on the trends of Virgil’s mental health on the long term to see if he could find patterns of what caused good and bad days so they could evaluate what could be done at a later time. However, Virgil thought he might be doing it because of his own inability to read the others’ emotions, because on days that Virgil pointed to anxious or upset the logical side would stay close, often bringing him offerings of food and cozy things until Virgil pointed to his mood brightening on the chart. In return Virgil made sure to pay more attention to Logan as well. He spoke up on his behalf when the others were ignoring him again. It hadn’t occurred to him before how much Logan was being overlooked, until Virgil found himself looking. Up until that point, Virgil’s own anxiousness made it difficult to accept anything Logan had to say. Janus and Remus had been quick to jump on any weakness they could find so Virgil was unsurprised by their initial mockery. However, he didn’t really understand Roman and Patton’s dismissal of Logan. They seemed to glaze over or even outright dismiss Logan’s lectures, despite their relevance.

So, Virgil simply started encouraging them.

Even during videos, he began giving gentle reminders that he was listening to him. That he understood and that the information Logan provided was helpful. Sure, sometimes Logan was long winded, but he always had a point. Once Virgil had started listening though, it was like a switch had been flipped because the others quickly followed. Soon Janus and Logan began getting into debates with Patton offering insight on whether the methods suggested felt right. Virgil reminded them of the worst-case scenarios and Roman offered creative solutions. Even Remus surprised nearly everyone when he began to chip in with obscure information in between dark jokes as Janus informed everyone that Remus was probably almost as well read as Logan because he favored accuracy in his projects. Virgil hadn’t done much, really it was Logan who had done all of the work, but suddenly it seemed as if the group as a whole was beginning to mesh.

Virgil had been so lost in thoughts; he hadn’t even noticed the others had changed out to a new movie as the opening credits rolled. Logan was looking at him again with the same expression he had when working through particularly difficult math problems.

It wasn’t enough. As much effort as Logan was routinely putting in to make sure Virgil was okay, the anxious side wanted to do something for him. Something to reciprocate the kindness the logical side never had to show him.

“Really Lo, for once everything’s really okay. I mean it.” And he did. Virgil offered Logan a half-smile in assurance and surprised even himself when he found it was completely genuine. He gestured to the notebook still in Logan’s lap. “Whacha working on?”

Logan’s look of surprise still stung a little, knowing what Virgil knew, but the joy that overtook his features as he began to explain through his notes and theories from the previous movie they had been watching on why he thought Belle hadn’t actually been going through Stockholm syndrome and why it was in fact the Beast who was experiencing Lima syndrome, after explaining of course what those meant.

Roman, apparently hearing at least some of their conversation pointed at Virgil dramatically and yelled “HA!”

Suddenly the current movie was paused as several eyes turned their way in amusement.

“I TOLD you Disney movies were good and wholesome with positive themes!” Roman declared at Virgil while Logan raised an eyebrow at Roman’s declaration.

“You got me Princy,” Virgil just muttered with a snort.

“Logan! You and me! We are going to have a Disney marathon and we are going to work together on proving once and for all that the movies have positive themes meant to touch the soul!”

“Yes, because Disney has never shown anything untoward in their films,” Janus teased from somewhere under his blanket pile.

Patton simultaneously giggled and shushed him, before gently chiding the snake on teasing Roman. Remus was too busy laughing to contribute to the conversation and Virgil was holding back his own laughter when Roman simply turned his chin up and took Logan's hands with puppy-eyes and suddenly knelt before him like a knight making a request to royalty.

“You’ll help me on this daring quest to defend the sanctity of Disney and prove them all wrong, won't you Logan?”

The question only made the lot of them laugh harder as Logan seemed to struggle for an answer.

“You...you do realize that the tales that the movies were adapted from were quite dark?”

Roman’s sudden dramatic gasp and the hand suddenly over his heart did nothing to help curb the current chorus of laughter. He didn’t seem to mind too much though, as he suddenly swooned and declared “The agony! The injustice! Betrayed by my fellow light side!”

A genuine look of horror overcame Logan’s face as Roman moved away from him to resettle. Logan appeared concerned he had genuinely upset the Prince, but it was then that Virgil stepped in.

“Don’t worry, he’s messin’ with you Lo,” Virgil whispered, taking Logan’s hand in his own.

Logan blinked, once, twice, and then his tense stance relaxed. He nodded to Virgil, indicating he now understood.

“Wanna tell me more?” Virgil asked in a murmur as the others had already gone back to their movie. The anxious side kept his voice hushed so the others wouldn’t interfere again. Logan simply was being listened to more often now, even by those who weren’t a part of the conversation.

Logan smiled and passed him his notebook, pointing to theories and notes as he explained them to the anxious side. Virgil tried listening, he really did, he was certain he picked up on almost everything that Logan had told him, but then he found himself distracted by one of the various sketches on a back page.

It was one of the similarities Logan had with Roman actually. They both were artistically inclined on a two-dimensional space. Even Remus didn’t sketch often, preferring three dimensional mediums that he could truly handle, such as sculpting. However, whenever Virgil complimented the logical side’s drawings, he would shake his head and correct him. Logan explained once that he was a draftsman, not an artist. He could draw what he sees with a printer-like quality, but he couldn’t simply create something on the page the way Roman could. Virgil would always shrug in response and remind him that talent is talent.

Virgil was unsure why he was so focused on the single drawing. There was a littering of stars across the page with two nearly equally sized planets in the distance. There wasn’t really anything that stood out about the sketch from Logan’s other planetary depictions. It wasn’t even as if star formations were unfamiliar to see in Logan’s notes. Virgil had noticed that sketching the stars seemed to be his favorite thing to do when he was stressed so the anxious side only encouraged the habit. It was just… well… Virgil had learned a lot about stars since he and Logan had gotten closer. A lot. At this point he could usually identify many star patterns on sight after many anxious nights seeking out Logan’s presence. Yet for some reason he couldn’t identify this one. Was it new? Was Logan looking at the NASA website again?

“Virgil?” Logan’s voice asked as a hand gently touched his shoulder through his hoodie. “Are you okay? Can you hear me?”

“Yeah, I can. Sorry Logan, I just got distracted.”

“By?”

“Nothing bad, I swear, just this,” Virgil said, pushing the notebook back toward Logan, while pointing to the star sketch. “I don’t know this one.”

“Oh,” Logan murmured and cleared his throat. “That, right. I would not concern yourself. You would not find this pattern anywhere easily."

Virgil snorted. That sounded like a challenge if he had ever heard one. “Well now you know I have to find it, just to prove to you that I can.”

Roman glanced their way, but wisely turned back to the screen when Logan ripped the page from his book and passed it to Virgil. He somehow even pulled off the anime glasses glint. “Of course, you do. Virgil, if you can find that formation within a week, I’ll go to whatever horror house you want come October.”

“And if I lose?”

“You’ll agree to come with me to the planetary exhibition.”

“You mean the one that’s a two-hour drive away?” Virgil whined. Voicing the same complaints, he had when Logan first proposed the idea. It’s not that he wanted to prevent Logan from going, but long car rides were the worst.

“The very same, Remus is already on my side and Janus is easily bribed but Thomas said I needed a majority vote to go.”

“You’re on,” Virgil said with a smirk. This would be easy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Roman's section on Disney wasn't part of my draft. He just kind of wormed his way into the story like the drama king he is.


	2. Wear and Wizened

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Virgil is certain he can win the bet. 
> 
> Logan smirks at him without a word as he passes by in the hall. 
> 
> Virgil is mostly certain he can win the bet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well this chapter reached over 7k words so that's fun I guess. 
> 
> Remus basically spent the entire writing process acting like my cat that comes and shoves his way into me giving my other cat attention.
> 
> Don't you dare feel bad for him either, he'll get his turn later.
> 
> Also, a headcannon of mine is Virgil swears a lot internally, but like tries to keep it pg around the lightsides.

“Mornin’ kiddo, you’re up early,” Patton called cheerfully as he entered the kitchen. That was until he took in Virgil’s slumped position on the counter and asked, “Or is it still latte for you?”

Virgil just groaned in response. His arms were cradled around a near empty coffee cup and pulled it closer, willing it to magically refill itself to no avail. He could conjure it, but it never had the effect that going through the process of making it did.

“While I’d normally tell you to get to bed, I already thought you had taken an early night last night? You went to your room awfully early,” Patton said, batting away Virgil’s hands to take the now empty cup and set it next to the already brewing pot of coffee.

Virgil internally thanked any and all deities that could hear him and MCR for the fatherly side in that moment.

That was, until Patton turned back to Virgil with a smug grin. “Roman missed you last night.”

Virgil immediately stuck his tongue out. “I only said he has nice arms one time!”

Patton’s grin only grew.

“You promised you wouldn’t get involved!” Virgil declared with a slight edge to his voice. 

Patton snorted, as if the steely glare of the embodiment of anxiety was like an adorable kitten sneezing at him in indignation. Still, he raised his hands up in mercy. “And I’m not! Look, this is me, not getting involved.”

“Uh huh,” Virgil said, letting out a groan. Still, he accepted the fresh cup of coffee that was passed his way as the peace offering it was.

“You know Virgil, you can’t stop matters of the heart, I should know, I’m-”

A damn traitor.

“This is a conversation we are not having again,” Virgil said, as he abruptly pushed off from his seat on the counter island, taking his freshly brewed coffee with him. If it was gonna be like that, next time he was going to goddamn Remy for coffee.

“Okay, okay! You win! I promise!” Patton declared laughing as he rushed toward Virgil, grabbing his arm to prevent his departure.

Virgil hadn’t responded verbally, he simply sighed to make sure his displeasure was still very much known and followed Patton back to his vacated spot. Unfortunately, he hadn’t been anticipating something to seemingly appear out of nowhere (he swears!) under his foot, resulting in his leg betraying him as he attempted to step. Rather than hold still as it was meant to, his entire leg just kept going, leaving him to face-plant directly into the tile.

“Oh my gosh Virgil!” Patton yelled and quickly crouched to his side. “Kiddo, talk to me, are you hurt?”

He groaned. What the hell was this week and why was everything against him?

Then he heard another pair of footsteps a little further off and knew someone, somewhere was out to get him when he realized exactly who it was.

“I _didn’t_ hear a crash! Is everything okay in here?!” The voice of Janus demanded, and Virgil was surprised to see a pair of yellow crocheted slippers stopped right next to him instead of the shiny leather shoes the snake usually favored. From his position on the floor, Virgil recognized the slippers as Patton’s work, but he couldn’t for the life of him understand how Patton had gotten Janus to actually wear them.

“I’m not sure yet,” Patton’s voice said frantically as he checked over his unmoving body for injury. “Virgil had a tumble and he’s not responding and-”

“I’m fine,” Virgil said, still groaning as he swatted Patton’s hands away.

“Liar,” Janus spat out with a huff and put a hand under his arm to help drag the anxious side off the floor as Patton took his other side.

Okay, yeah it was a little bit of a lie. The world was spinning a bit and he was so goddamn tired. He was certain that was from the all-nighter he had just pulled though, rather than injury. The week deadline Logan had given him was quickly coming to a close and he still had no leads on his search. In addition to that, now Virgil’s shoulder ached, and the entire left side of his face was sore, but it wasn’t as if anything hurt enough to be broken. Probably.

Patton let out a gasp as he finally looked up at Virgil sitting on the counter. The fatherly side’s hands came up over his mouth in shock and only moved long enough for him to cry, “Oh no Virge! Your face!”

“Look, I know I’m not the most attractive here, but-”

Patton made a horrified choking sound at the implication Virgil was making and Janus let out a snort and spoke before Patton could go on another tirade defending Virgil from himself.

“He means the entire side of your face _isn't_ covered in bruises you menace,” Janus told him levelly as he passed Virgil an ice pack. “I swear, between you and Remus…”

Virgil picked up a stray serving spoon from the counter and used to look at himself on the shiny metallic surface. “So it is.”

Apparently, Patton felt that the deceitful and anxious sides were not giving the situation the attention it was due because he abruptly yelled, “Virgil, WHAT just happened?!?!”

Virgil could see Patton’s fingers twitching to shake the anxious side and make him somehow love himself, so he figured he should answer rather than torture the emotional side further.

“I dunno popstar. It felt like I slipped on something.”

“You mean this?” Janus said, peering down at a now crumpled and slightly dirty sheet of paper that seemed to magically appear in his grasp. Virgil would never understand the snake’s strange stealth and how he managed to move or do things, seemingly without anyone noticing.

When Virgil didn’t answer, Janus clicked his tongue and passed the paper to Patton. The moral side took it immediately and began inspecting it before Virgil could get in a word edgewise to stop him. Virgil watched as the worry on Patton’s face seemed to soften as he looked it over. That was...interesting.

“Is this Logan’s?” Patton asked, placing the paper to the side.

“Sort of,” Virgil said and groaned, pulling the ice away from his face to talk easier.

Patton squawked in horror and snatched the ice pack out of his hands, before immediately returning it to Virgil’s face himself. “Kiddo you’ve gotta stop moving.”

“Okay, okay, okay,” Virgil complied with a small laugh and he could see Janus smirking from the corner of his eye. “Don’t you have breakfast to make or something?”

“No, I have a self-destructive son to take care of first,” Patton said with the “dad” tone that made it clear that he was figuratively (Virgil really has been hanging out with Logan too much) putting his foot down on the matter. “Janus?”

“I can’t handle it, of course,” Janus said with a smug grin aimed Virgil’s way as he playfully bowed and slunk around the island to the stove. Virgil was certain the effect would have been more dramatic in his usual attire, but for the moment the deceitful side was adorning an oversized sweater with a handmade looking scarf around his neck. The only thing still present from his normal clothing was the yellow gloves covering his hands.

When had that happened?

Virgil wasn’t certain he remembered the last time he’d seen Janus look so comfortable. Even in the subconscious, it was rare to see even just his bowler hat missing, much less ninety percent of his outfit.

Still, everything about the snake’s demeanor told Virgil that Janus was thoroughly enjoying watching Virgil get reprimanded by someone other than himself. Probably thinking back to all the times he had to patch Virgil and Remus back up in the subconscious… mostly Remus of course.

“Tell me more about the paper,” Patton instructed as he carefully unzipped Virgil’s hoodie and gently guided it off of him, taking extra care around Virgil’s left side.

Virgil only winced twice from the pain.

“Logan’s paper?”

As the jacket was bundled and set to the side, Virgil could feel a draft of cool air immediately assault his senses as goosebumps rose on his arms. Suddenly the mild ache only hurt worse without the comforting warmth that had been protecting him from the elements. He looked to the lump of fabric longingly, feeling suddenly bare without it.

“Yes that paper,” Patton replied seemingly automatically, more distracted by the anxious side’s physical state than the response as he did an initial check for signs of bleeding. He was probably trying to keep the conversation going for Virgil’s benefit, rather than his own.

Virgil seemed to pass at least the preliminary examination because the fatherly side nodded to himself. Keeping one hand on holding the ice to Virgil’s face, Patton used his remaining hand to poke and prod at the anxious side, checking him over for less obvious battle damage. Virgil winced when Patton got to the ribs on his left side, but only a little of that reaction was from pain.

“Does it hurt there kiddo?” Patton asked.

“He’s ticklish,” Janus replied smoothly from his spot at the stove.

Leave it to Janus to be able to tell the truth at the most inopportune of moments. Patton grinned at the new information and Virgil internally groaned, cursing the snake for betraying him like this.

What _happened_ in the subconsciousness was supposed to _stay_ in the subconsciousness dammit.

“We have a bet,” Virgil said, trying to change the subject as he glared over his shoulder at the snake. “Logan said if I can figure out where the star drawing, he made is from, he’d go with me to any horror house I want.”

“And if you lose?” Patton asked with an edge of doubt in his voice.

The moral side looked so concerned, his initial reaction to any sort of gambling was always hesitancy. Virgil usually agreed with him, given that the entire point of gambling was risk, and his literal job was risk prevention. This time however, the consequences were well and truly harmless. A few hours in a cramped car probably wouldn’t kill him. _Probably._ Thomas traveled farther for cons and gigs all of the time. It would be fine. It would. Right? Right…? But what if there’s something wrong with the car? What if there was a drunk driver on the road? What if the brakes were cut and they crash? What if something happened to Joan while they were spending hours away at the-

“Virgil!”

Virgil looked up and found Janus in front of him, six arms were suddenly holding him in place as he shook. Still, Virgil could see his own hands trembling in his grasp. 

“It’s okay,” Janus insisted to him.

It took him a moment to concentrate on the scene before him, but then he suddenly gulped for air like a drowning man.

When had he stopped breathing?

“It’s okay Virgil, you’re safe,” Janus said again, staring into Virgil’s eyes with a serious expression. “I promise you.”

“Well now I know I’m dying,” Virgil replied flatly, around a now slightly hoarse voice.

The snake sighed and instantly all of his hands dropped, releasing their grip. Virgil didn’t even wince as he stared back defiantly. Another moment passed between the two, as Janus crossed one pair of his arms, but Virgil refused to back down. He agreed they were allowed to be around, he even agreed that they were allowed to give their opinion to Thomas, but he never agreed to like it.

Janus was the first to look away.

“Well I suppose if you’re well enough to be snarky, then you don’t need my help re-grounding you,” Janus said coolly, taking the many platters he must have been previously carrying toward the dining room.

Virgil could see Patton’s expression had only grown more worried as he watched Janus’ retreating form. The concern didn’t lessen however when he turned his attention back to Virgil. Large cyan orbs, that were only magnified behind the thick black frames, looked on the brink of crying. Patton’s arms were pulled tight to his chest in the same way he used to hold them when Virgil first met him and still suspiciously rejected his hugs. A pang of guilt instantly shot through the anxious side, but he wasn’t entirely certain what to do about it.

Virgil was protecting him dammit.

“Is this bet really so bad that it causes you to go into an attack?” Patton asked seriously, slightly giving into the apparent need to hug as he wrapped an arm around Virgil’s less injured side.

“Nothing like that Pat,” Virgil said hugging back and trying to reassure the emotional side. “It’s just a trip to the planetarium if I lose.”

Virgil could feel Patton slumping against him and let out a breath of relief.

“Patton? Did you think it was bad?”

“You can’t send me through these emotional rollercoasters Virge, I’m the heart I can’t take it,” Patton moaned, pulling Virgil into an even tighter hug around both arms this time.

“Owww,” Virgil complained, and Patton jerked back from him like he was on fire.

“Sorry!”

“It’s fine Pat,” Virgil muttered once he was free and pulled his jacket back over to himself, shrugging into it. That was enough prodding for the moment. If he was going to be in pain, he was damn well going to be comfortable.

“Virgil, are you really okay kiddo?” Patton asked after the jacket was firmly back into place.

“My shoulder’s a little sore but I can move it fine,” Virgil said, rolling shoulder and sticking out his arm as proof. “Besides that, I’m alright. If it makes you feel better, I could have Logan check it out later.”

“It would.”

Virgil returned the warm smile Patton directed at him with his own and burrowed into his jacket a little uncomfortably. Today was just overall being an extra bitch of a rollercoaster ride. Too much more and Virgil would swear he’d have emotional whiplash.

“I hate to break up this...uh ‘sweet’ moment and all, but breakfast _isn’t_ ready and waiting on the table,” Janus said, leaning against the doorway between the barrier between the kitchen and dining room.

“Thanks Janus!” Patton exclaimed, perking up. “I’ll go get the others!”

As Patton ran off toward the corridors, Virgil slipped off the counter and past Janus. It wasn’t as if he wanted to prolong his shared time with the snake and the dining room was as good of a place to wait as anywhere since Janus would likely busy himself soon in the kitchen with getting drinks or something like he did most mornings now. It had somehow become his and Patton’s strange routine.

“You know… if you really wanted to win, you should absolutely avoid asking Remus for help,” Janus said.

Virgil saw a piece of paper between his gloved fingers that he was examining, and Virgil immediately knew what it was, but checked his pockets and general person again for the sketch because it was a fucking wonder how the snake managed to get it without him seeing again.

“What would Remus know about stars?” Virgil rolled his eyes, snatching the sheet back and stuffing it deep in his hoodie pocket, wrinkles be damned.

Janus stood taller and squared his shoulders, a scowl overtook his features as he said, “More than you’d think.”

Virgil tried not to wince at the angry tone, and he wasn’t certain he managed it, but he could practically feel the sincerity of the words coming through. It didn’t seem to matter how ridiculous or how much smaller the already shorter side looked in casual clothing, Virgil couldn’t help the intimidation he felt at that moment.

When Virgil didn’t reply, Janus just rolled his eyes.

“Remus and Logan _haven’t_ been trading science texts back and forth recently and lord knows that Logan _hates_ talking anyone’s ear off he can about stars,” Janus said, turned away from Virgil as he instead fidgeted with the silverware at the table, “straightening” it.

He still hadn’t gone for the cups.

“If anyone could recognize some constellation or something on sight besides Logan, it _isn’t_ Remus,” Janus insisted, and Virgil thought he looked a little...proud? Impressed? “But you’d know that of course dear Virgil because you simply know _everything_ that goes on around here.”

Janus stared at him as if waiting for a response.

He didn’t have one.

“Why are you helping me?” Virgil asked, crossing his arms.

Virgil didn’t understand, he honestly didn’t.

What was the snake’s game this time?

“Because _everything_ is about _you_ ,” Janus snarked out, putting a hand on his hip.

The conversation didn’t get to go any further because the darker creative twin himself suddenly skipped his way into the room, as if summoned by the turn of the conversation.

“Dee!” Remus yelled, throwing his arms around one of Janus’ own in a hug. “I see you’ve finally waged a mutiny against Morality and taken over breakfast! Will there be shampoo?”

Janus snorted and reached up to the taller side to pat his shoulder fondly, “Not this time Ree.”

Remus slunk off to his now-usual seat at the table pouting as Janus finally moved back toward the kitchen to finish setting up before the others arrived.

“Oh shit emo, did you have a fight with a school bus and _lose_?” Remus asked, sounding absolutely delighted at this possibility.

Virgil put his hood up and willed the other sides to get here faster. This was another conversation he was not having.

* * *

Breakfast was a blessedly quiet affair that morning after a nuclear bout of embarrassment on Virgil’s part. Roman had been instantly ready to go to war with anything and everything when he saw the bruising on Virgil’s face. Even Janus informing Roman that the culprit was the tiled floor of the kitchen didn’t seem to deter Roman’s wrath as he was ready to take it out and replace the damn surface with something softer. That of course, didn’t help Virgil’s shame about the situation, but neither did Remus literally laughing out loud until he was nearly on the floor himself. It took Patton a little while, but he did eventually get everyone calm down enough to eat their breakfast in peace. The situation might have been resolved quicker had Logan been present to bring some nonchalance to the situation, but apparently the logical side had seen fit to skip breakfast that morning. Patton said something about him falling asleep at his desk again. Apparently, Patton had woken him just long enough to send Logan to his actual bed. Still, Patton also informed Virgil that Logan was expecting him for a checkup that afternoon, as if he were a _real doctor_ or something.

Virgil barely held back from rolling his eyes.

But he wanted to.

He _really_ wanted to.

Apparently, Remus and Janus used their creepy darksides “sixth sense” that he had never inherited because they seemingly noticed the action he didn’t do and still saw fit to smirk at him mockingly anyway.

Speaking of Remus, Virgil was in the middle of a staring contest with the darker creative twin’s door and had been for several minutes already. The door was winning so far, but Virgil was certain he could come out on top if he just tried hard enough. He really couldn’t believe he was doing this. He couldn’t believe he was following Janus’ advice of all people and he couldn’t believe that he was going to Remus for help. He almost didn’t _care_ at this point dammit! So, what if they went to the stupid planetarium? Who cares? It’s not like he was against Logan being happy or anything. Hell! He had even considered giving his vote for it even if he had won! It was….

Virgil groaned again.

It was the stupid principle of the thing. Just because losing wouldn’t be that bad didn’t mean he wanted to. He wanted the victory. He wanted to be able to rub it in Logan’s face the next time Logan was snarky or thought he knew everything. Yes, he had made better friends with the logical side recently. Yes, he wanted Logan to succeed, to do well and to be listened to. Yes, Virgil cared about his friend a great deal. None of that meant that Logan was without fault though. He could still be completely insufferable and smug. Honestly, what kind of friend would Virgil be if he didn’t put Logan back in his place when he got big headed every now and again?

And he also just wanted to win.

That was a big and _enticing_ part of it.

“Well?!”

The familiar voice of Remus coming from behind Virgil’s back, startled the anxious side enough that he nearly fell over for a second time that day.

“Are you going to just stand there all day My Chemical Retch or are you gonna come in?” Remus asked, reaching over him for the door handle to open it to Virgil’s personal doom.

Virgil wondered how long Remus had been standing there behind him. He hadn’t heard the intrusive side approaching at all. Remus successfully sneaking up on him would have been unheard of in the days back in the subconsciousness.

“The others have made you soft, you know,” Remus said with a snort, as if he could read the anxious side’s mind.

“Actually having people give a shit about me isn’t a weakness Rem,” Virgil bit back.

“Bold words coming from someone seeking me out,” Remus replied, letting out his uncontrolled and irritating laugh. Still, Virgil didn’t miss the new layer of bitterness coloring the tone of Remus’ response.

The creative side let himself fall into an oversized cushion on the floor. The thing looked hard, ragged and uncomfortable, but Remus sprawled on it with a look of ease as if he were laying on a cloud. Virgil decided to stay standing. The surroundings were almost disturbingly clean compared to what he remembered. While it was still cluttered, there was a surprising lack of trash. Despite this, Virgil didn’t trust touching any of the surfaces enough to believe he’d walk away from them slime free.

“You’ve cleaned up,” Virgil noted off-handedly. They needed a conversation change anyway.

“Yeah well, when my room decided to yeet itself over to this side it left a bunch of my shit behind,” Remus said with a shrug, reaching to the side of him toward a drawer and rummaging through it. His hand came back with a deodorant stick and he held it out to Virgil first. “Want one?”

“Uh no,” Virgil said and grimaced. It grossed him out in the subconsciousness, and it grossed him out still.

“More for me!” Remus chimed, and took a large bite of the semisolid substance as white crumbled down his sparkling tunic.

Gross.

Virgil had to swallow down the urge to upchuck. He was already imagining the texture hitting his own pallet from the time Remus had tried to stuff a deodorant bar down his throat years ago. Payback for daring to suggest Remus might be faking it. Sometimes he wished the move to the consciousness would have purged some of those less pleasant memories from his mind. Unfortunately, anxious side couldn’t be so lucky as the awareness of the weirdly smooth texture of deodorant on his tongue was still burned into his brain.

“Look Remus, I don’t want to be here anymore than you want me to be here,” Virgil said with a huff. “I just need to know, if you know where this star pattern is.”

Figuring it was about time they got to the point. He pulled the now worn and crumpled page from his pocket and handed it over to the intrusive side, praying that Remus wouldn’t see fit to eat it after the paper was already out of his hands. He should have made a second copy. He didn’t, but he should have. Foresight wasn’t really Virgil’s specialty outside of Thomas, panicking after bad decisions though? That was more his jam.

Thankfully, his fears seemed to be unfounded because Remus simply set the deodorant stick to the side and shook his hands free of crumbs before even touching the page. Strangely enough, the duke smoothed his hands over the wrinkles and until the page returned to its state of being a mostly flattened sheet. Then he held the page with an uncharacteristic carefulness as he studied it. He turned the page around and muttered to himself about some of the written notes briefly before turning back to the sketch Virgil wanted him to pay attention to. Virgil could see the gears turning until the metaphorical lock clicked in Remus’ eyes. He at least knew something.

“It doesn’t exist,” Remus said with a shrug.

“Remus, it has to. Logan can’t make things up. Please Remus, are you certain you’ve never seen it?”

“Well, there’s no star patterns like this one that I’ve seen,” Remus said with a huff and readjusted on his cushion to face away from Virgil as if the conversation was over. 

“Don’t-” Virgil started in his tempest voice from frustration. He paused, took a breath, and moved into Remus’ view to try again. “Remus don’t lie to me.”

“Lying is no more my thing than creating is Logan’s, but you know that Virgy,” Remus teased in a sing-song voice.

Virgil just crossed his arms and stared him down.

Remus sighed dramatically and Virgil could hear the whiny ‘fiiiiine’ the duke projected as he threw his head back and slumped his form without Remus needing to actually say the words.

“Look emo, just because my brother’s fantasy obsessed and doesn’t care about anything being accurate, doesn’t mean I do. I’ve been working my ass off these past months at the nerd’s request to make sure the sky in the imagination is as accurate as possible for your dates.”

Remus paused in his tirade to give Virgil an uncharacteristically serious look.

“Do you even know how exhausting it is to create and maintain a night sky that stands up to the high-powered telescopes that Logan uses?”

“It’s not like that! We’re not-” Virgil defended immediately. He and Virgil definitely didn’t have that kind of relationship. Virgil liked- Virgil liked… _no one_ of course. “Logan’s just trying to help me deal with my shit because he’s really decent-”

“Okay,” Remus said, grabbing his deodorant stick again and sprawling out on his floor cushion as if he was already done with this conversation.

“-and you know what? All of the light sides are! They don’t always understand and yeah, it took them awhile to hear me out, but now they always try -”

“I know Virge.”

“-and it’s nothing like it was in the subconsciousness where we all just ignored each other's problems and-”

“I get it.”

“-they’re like family. Wait… you… you do?” Virgil asked, cutting off his defensive rant as the intrusive side’s words finally started to register.

Remus and Virgil met stares for a bit, as if neither really knew what to say. It was a truly unusual sight because they were usually the two sides that the others used to beg to quiet down. After a long moment of just evaluating each other, as if they were some foreign entities to one another that hadn’t spent years together in the darkness. In the end it was Remus that spoke first, but that was usually the case.

“What, do you think me and Dee liked being ignored? Pushed aside? Forgotten? Why do you think we’re here?”

Virgil didn’t have an answer for that one.

“Haven’t you seen Janus recently?” Remus asked if that idea alone was somehow the answer to everything. Still, Virgil recognized the uncomfortable expression that overtook the duke’s features. It was so much like the one he had years before, when he still asked after his brother’s wellbeing. “He’s been over the moon since your Morality started to hear him out.”

“And… that bothers you?”

“What?! No!” Remus yelped, crossing his arms and pointedly looking at the floor.

Darkside or not, Remus never had been very good at lying.

“Look, I just mean I get it. The light sides do all the shit we didn’t. I get that they’re trying, I do have eyes, Virgil. Logan’s… alright… I guess. He lets me borrow his books and he helps me now when I ask.”

“Uh… yeah,” Virgil agreed, but couldn’t completely stave off the slight guilt at his own agreement. He had to force away thoughts of Janus knocking on his door in the subconscious many times just to check on his well-being as he used to ignore the deceitful side. Virgil… Virgil was a different person then too.

Virgil apparently had missed a chunk of whatever Remus was going on about as he became momentarily lost in his own mind, but it didn’t seem to be anything really of importance.

“-I mean he’s an absolute prude when it comes to approving ideas, but at least he’s not scared of me. Plus, he doesn’t have the emotional hang ups that you and the others do. So yeah, I get it.”

“...Okay?” Virgil asked. This conversation was absolutely not going at all how he expected it to. Not that he had expected much. Remus and he didn’t really just… talk… like ever. “Wait… why did Logan go to you to edit the imagination anyway? We’re always on Roman’s side. I just assumed Roman was the one setting up the stars for us?”

“HA!” Remus exclaimed, laughing almost manically at the idea. “As if! Perfect Roman hasn’t even noticed me editing the entire sky of the imagination. At my own side’s detriment too! Fucking flowers have started a hostile takeover of my side because I’ve been working so much on this stupid sky project.”

What the hell.

It wasn’t even a question, just a general statement of the world turning upside down in front of the anxious side’s very eyes. Virgil honestly wasn’t even sure what to do with this conversation anymore. This wasn’t supposed to be profound or anything. He was supposed to get in, ask about the drawing and then get out.

Thankfully, Remus didn’t wait for him to respond.

“So, when are you going to tell him you hate star gazing?” Remus asked him in a sing-song voice after he resettled, chin in his hand, looking reminiscent of a smug cat. “What was it you said that one time? Oh yea!”

Remus cleared his throat and adjusted so he was imitating Virgil’s slouched shoulders. He ruffled his hair in front of his face before leaning against the wall with his arms wrapped around one bent knee to complete the look.

“It’s like… staring into an empty endless voice that forces awareness of your empty, miniscule existence in it,” Remus mimicked, nailing Virgil’s deeper drawl.

“Hilarious,” Virgil replied as Remus broke character to wiggle his eyebrows teasingly. “Also, never. The dude’s gone through enough, he needs an ally. Plus, it’s not so bad out there. It’s growing on me.”

“Like spores!” Remus cheered in agreement.

He truly never changed.

“Whelp, I think I’ve gotten all I’m going to out of this conversation,” Virgil said and turned to the door. “I uh… I should go. I’m supposed to have a checkup anyway. Sorry for bothering you Rem.”

His hand was already turning the doorknob when Remus let out a gruff groaning noise before pushing himself to his feet.

“Ugh, Virge wait. Give me your phone,” Remus said making grabby hands in Virgil’s direction.

“...why?” Virgil asked, nearly taking a step further from Remus’ reach as he eyed him suspiciously.

“You should probably check out that stupid website Logan’s always on. If the star thing exists, it's probably on there.”

“The NASA site? I’ve already tried it.”

“No, the other one,” Remus said, rolling his eyes as if the information was both obvious and beneath him. “It’s called EarthSky, but there’s a few specific tabs on it you should look at, now gimme.”

Virgil conceded his phone to the duke and tapped his foot as he watched the chaotic side maneuver to his web browser.

“Look at my browsing history and I end you.”

“Oooooo, Virgins’, got something juicy hidden in here?” Remus said and pulled the phone closer to himself as Virgil tried to swipe it back. “Oh, fine emo. You’re no fun anymore, you know that?”

“I’ll take that as a compliment coming from you,” Virgil said, taking his phone back with a little more force than necessary when Remus reached to return it.

From there, Virgil was quick to leave. As a former darkside, Virgil had some immunity the others didn't, but the duke’s room would start getting to him if he stuck around much longer. He really didn’t need intrusive thoughts mixing with his anxiety. That usually made for a pretty unstable concoction of overwhelming fear for Virgil and a really shitty day for Thomas.

Still, he was glad that he stuck around long enough to see the toothy grin Remus shot him when he mumbled a quiet “thanks.”

Things weren’t really okay between them, he knew.

But it was something.

* * *

“Logan what the hell?!?” Virgil asked, after stomping his way into the Logical side’s room for the second time that night, but this time without asking.

The checkup earlier had been brief and Logan gave him a quick overview before suggesting painkillers and some rest. Thankfully, they healed much faster than regular humans, so he should feel as good as new within a couple days. Despite Logan’s push for him to take a break, Virgil wasn’t ready to give up yet. He had until morning the next day to find where the damn stars were, and he wasn’t going to waste it over clumsiness.

Still, his barging into the Logical side’s room just hours later without even announcing his presence first probably wasn’t what Logan was intending when he had given Virgil an open invitation to his room months ago. But at the moment Virgil was frustrated enough that he didn’t care as he used his standing position to stare down at the usually taller man who was currently working away at his desk.

“Welcome Virgil, nice to see you, thank you so much for knocking,” Logan drawled.

Virgil almost felt whiplash at how easily sarcasm came to the logical side. It reminded him of Janus every time he did it. Still, the deceitful side tended to oversell it in Virgil’s opinion, overdramatizing his ire until everyone was drowning in it. Logan’s sarcasm always came forth blank-faced, only letting his annoyance hang in the air for a moment before moving on.

“What can I do for you today?” Logan asked, his normal nonchalance back into place as he pushed aside his work to cross his hands on his desk.

“I have been looking for this damn star sign all week you know!” Virgil said, shoving the now pathetically worn and coffee-stained paper in Logan’s face.

“So, you’ve been able to keep busy then?”

“What do you think?!” Virgil demanded, crossing his arms. “I’ve searched every book I could think of! I even went to Remus for help and you know what? He said it didn’t exist! And you know what else? Apparently stupid me didn’t believe him and kept searching anyway until I wanted to throw my computer out the goddamned window!”

“Did your computer survive?”

“Yes. No thanks to you,” Virgil replied, mumbling. Why was it so hard to yell at someone who refuses to yell back dammit?

“Would you explain the problem then? I’m afraid, I’m not certain I understand,” Logan said, pushing his glasses up to rub his eyes. Virgil felt a pang of guilt at that, wondering how long the logical side had been awake, but he forced it down. He was sleep deprived too and it was absolutely Logan’s fault this time!

“Remus was right, wasn’t he?! It doesn’t exist!”

“What does not exist Virgil?” Logan asked, replacing his glasses. He blinked once and Virgil could see sudden understanding practically hit Logan in the face as Virgil gestured to the paper. “Oh, you mean the sketch. No, it is not a current star pattern than I am aware of.”

“What the HELL Logan?!” Virgil reiterated, given the questions now layered meanings. First off, how could he and second, since when could he? They were supposed to be friends dammit! He should know these things!

“I thought you couldn’t make anything up!”

“I did not ‘make anything up’ as you say. I simply abstracted something else by combining two things,” Logan explained.

“I thought that was Roman’s job!” Virgil accused.

“It is, I do not believe I could tap into creativity on a larger scale even if I wanted to. Still, I am not completely without the ability to create Virgil. I create schedules every day. Even the concepts I summarize in lecture form for videos take some ability of creation.”

Apparently today was the day Virgil learned a lot of new things about his friends, because seriously, what the hell?! It was like he didn’t know anything anymore. What was next? A villainous Roman? A lying Patton? Was nothing sacred?!

“Have you had any anxiety attacks recently?”

“What?” Virgil asked, his frustrated defenses crumbled instantly at the question that seemed to come out of nowhere.

Logan just repeated himself.

“Uh… just one,” Virgil mumbled, rubbing his arm uncomfortably. “This morning I had one thinking of crashing on the way to your stupid planetarium.”

Okay, yeah, he was still mad.

“I am sorry for causing you distress Virgil. That was never my intention,” Logan replied squeezing his hands together a little tighter. He looked guilty. Logan never looked guilty. “I thought by having something to focus on, having a task to do with low stakes, you might find yourself worrying less with some of that bundled energy redirected. I never intended for you to push yourself so hard.”

He looked away from Virgil and added, “We can forget about the planetarium visit.”

“What, why?!” Virgil asked. “You won.”

“I never intended to cause you additional stress.” Logan said slowly, seeming to will his intent to each syllable. “Virgil if you are so concerned about the trip, we simply should not go.”

Virgil groaned and let himself fall into a sitting position on Logan’s bed. It wasn’t fair, Logan wasn’t supposed to make him feel bad. What even was today anymore? He couldn’t even be angry right.

“No Logan, we should go.”

Logan spun his chair toward Virgil, facing the anxious side. “But you said-”

“I know Lo, I know,” Virgil said, cutting off Logan. “Look, I spiraled. It happens and it’s going to happen. It’s part of my whole thing. It doesn’t mean we should hide away. Plus, even as anxiety attacks go, it was mild...Janus was able to get me out of it quickly.”

Logan nodded in response, seemingly absorbing the new information.

“So yeah, you have my vote Lo, seems your game worked some anyway.”

“Please know that I had initially said it in jest at the time,” Logan admitted. “I simply allowed it to continue because you seemed as if you were having fun. I assumed your lack of visits regarding nightmares was a positive sign.”

“More like a sign of my lack of sleep,” Virgil snorted wondering how Logan missed all of the extra coffee he drank over the past week.

“I apologize,” Logan frowned. It wasn’t quite a pout, but close.

“I know Lo, and I appreciate it,” Virgil said with a soft smile before he let his back fall against the bed underneath him. It was so soft. Much softer than he’d ever have pegged the logical side to have.

“You should try to get some rest Virgil. You look as if you might pass out and fall.”

“Mmm, you’re probably right,” Virgil muttered with a sigh, lazily pushing himself off Logan’s bed.

Virgil swiped back the sketch paper from Logan’s desk and stuck his tongue out playfully at the logical side. He planned on scrapbooking it later. Patton had been showing him how. His weren’t anything as elaborate or beautiful as the memory books Patton made, but he liked keeping a few spare mementos. Logan gave him a little wave and turned back to the paperwork on his desk as Virgil sauntered out of the blue-doored room and back into the commons’ hall.

It really had been a long day.

Instead of heading to his own room, he decided to take a nap on the commons’ couch. As extra as the day had been, he knew the effect of his room could agitate his now good mood with self-doubt. He was a little surprised to see Patton still awake and in the main room but brushed it off when he saw the moral side knitting away. The green yarn made him suspect the moral side was working on a peace offering for Remus, but Virgil wouldn’t spoil it for him and tell. After waving at the fatherly side in greeting, Virgil groaned and let himself fall into the plush length of the commons’ couch, his face meeting cushion as he willed the furniture to swallow him whole.

This was not his week.

Or his day.

“Any luck on finding the stars?” Patton asked cheerfully from his spot near Virgil’s head.

“Nah,” Virgil mumbled, muffed by the floof around him. “Logan was playing a trick.”

“Really?” Patton asked, pausing his stitch and pushing the project to the side. “That doesn’t sound like him.”

“It was a nice trick,” Virgil clarified and smiled as Patton started to card his fingers through Virgil’s hair.

It felt nice. The fatherly side was always so gentle with this kinda stuff. He hadn’t really had that kind of platonic affection before coming to the consciousness. Not for a long time at least.

“So, everything’s okay between you two?” Patton asked, a hint of concern still in his big blue eyes.

“Don’t worry about it popstar, you know that’s my job.”

“I guess you’re right kiddo….”

“Me and Lo are good though, I promise.”

Patton smiled down at Virgil, scratching at his scalp affectionately as Virgil increasingly melted. He could feel his vision blurring as the will to sleep was slowly taking over. It was funny actually, seeing Patton’s face blurring and out of focus like that almost looked like-

Virgil sat up, suddenly awake and ripped the abused note sheet from his jacket pocket, rapidly staring between it and Patton’s face, checking and double checking that the conspiracy theory videos he watched so much hadn’t driven him absolutely insane.

He wasn’t.

“V-virgil? Is everything okay kiddo?” Patton asked. His head was tilted, one arm resting on Virgil’s shoulder as he embodied the very picture of concern.

Virgil couldn’t bring himself to focus on that right now, because as he compared the placement of the stars and planets hand drawn on the notepaper, he found they matched up exactly with Patton’s eyes and the freckles scattered across his face.

“Oh,” was all Virgil could bring himself to say at that revelation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Creatwins who? All I see are the Chaotwins.


	3. Fabricated Impromptu

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Virgil enlists help in order to meddle because he knows.
> 
> He knows Logan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I changed my mind, this one's going to be four chapters instead of three. I had this chapter basically finished for a while, but it felt like it was dragging because I was trying to tack two massive chapters together.

“Virge, are you sure?” Roman’s normally booming voice asked in unusually quiet consideration. Yet, he still rose a dubious brow. “You know I’m always up for a good romance, but I don’t think we should jump to conclusions on this. I mean, it is _Logan_ after all.”

Virgil sat in one of the chaises in Roman’s room, sprawled out against the red velvet seating, a pile of books in his lap and his elbows tucked into pillows that had no right to be as comfortable as they were. Leave it to the Prince to make furniture that felt exactly as the anxious side imagined sitting on a cloud to feel. Virgil decided that Roman truly lived in the life of luxury with his set up. There was nothing in the room that wasn’t simultaneously exquisite and/or stupidly comfortable. Virgil had actually started on the floor and had been perfectly content sprawled out on the plush carpet that felt more luxurious than his own bed. Yet, as soon as the royal himself noticed, Virgil found himself quickly bullied into sitting on “real furniture” that looked as if it belonged in a fairy tale book. Needless to say, it didn’t look as if _he_ belonged on it. He felt a little like a Disney villain, crashing the hero’s party and acting as if everything’s normal even though they clearly stick out like a piece of garbage against pristine marble tile. Yep, Virgil definitely felt like that piece of trash compared to all of the beautiful, rich things surrounding the prince’s space.

However, the longer he was there, the more Virgil found himself unbearably comfortable. His muscles slowly unwound like a gently rolling ball of yarn, melting further and further into the velveteen. When he chanced putting his feet up on the length of the chair, he tensed again when Roman looked his way. Virgil was certain he was going to get chastised for his sneakers or something. He didn’t. As graceful as always, Roman simply smiled in that soft way Virgil felt he was only just recently becoming privy to as the prince opened up to him more.

To be completely honest, there was the tiniest part of Virgil that was a little envious of the moral and logical side. For, he was certain Logan and Patton must have received those same soft smiles long before Virgil caught a glimpse of that happiness. Roman had those kind of smiles that simply filled the room with pure goodness and light as he drew in those around him like insects to a particularly bright flame. It was almost too much sometimes. Not even a week ago he had watched absolutely confounded as Roman’s smile effortlessly turn the mood of the entire room around and wasn’t _that_ just all the worse?

It was a stark reminder of the divide that still existed between him and the original light sides.

Because Virgil would never be that, _could_ never be that.

Virgil was dark, sarcastic, even mean spirited sometimes. Sure, those were things that he was working on, but the very fact that working at it was necessary, reminded him that he would never be able to do what the prince could so effortlessly, hell without even _realizing_ it most of the time. Janus and Remus’ emergence to the consciousness reminded him who he truly fit in best with.

He was a darkside.

_Still though._

For the moment, Virgil decided to push his thoughts of the divide aside. Just because he was self-aware of his own standing, didn’t mean he couldn’t _try_ to do something good. Patton was always reminding him that fear was hardly all he had to offer. Even if he knew there was a part of him that would never truly belong with the lightsides, it didn’t mean he couldn’t find a sort of greyzone to meet in the middle. If that were possible, then maybe... maybe even Janus and Remus could find their way into a place like that too.

Finally, Virgil turned back to Roman who had been staring at him expectantly, waiting for an answer. They had been talking about the issue at hand for the better part of an hour. At first Roman was eager to talk about the possibilities of a secret love between the two blue sides. He happily joked and theorized about what that kind of relationship would look like from a romantic standpoint. However, as the conversation went on and Roman became increasingly aware of Virgil’s seriousness on the subject, he started to backpedal.

“No, really! I think he’s liked Patton for like... forever,” Virgil said, grabbing one of the loose notebooks and sifting through it. “I mean think of like... dinner!”

“Virgil, I’ve been close with both Patton and Logan for... well for years. Me and the professor haven’t always been on the best of terms, but I think I would have noticed it,” Roman said with a frown.

“What about dinner?” Virgil asked with an insistent tone.

“What _about_ dinner?” Roman parroted back with a single brow raised.

“Ever since Janus and Remus’ rooms moved he’s started staying after and helping Patton with dishes. He never did that before!”

“Well sure, but two additional people does add to the number of dishes that need to be washed. What if he’s just trying to be nice?”

“Yeah, but why doesn’t he do it at breakfast?” Virgil asked, sitting up as if that statement alone had proved everything. It did, didn’t it? No?

“Well, Janus usually helps him with that now-”

“Exactly!” Virgil exclaimed, jumping up from the chase before grabbing Roman’s hands in his own. “So you DO see!”

“Virgil... have you gotten any _real_ sleep since that bet with Logan?” Roman asked, reaching a hand out to trace his thumb across the prominent dark bags under Virgil’s eyes. The anxious side was devoid of actual makeup for once. It seemed to suddenly click to the prince that the dark splotches under his eyes were completely real this time and without powdery accentuation.

Virgil waved him off.

“I’ve had a few hours, it’s fine,” Virgil said with a shrug. He had been a little distracted recently by his current obsession, but even long sleepless nights would eventually give way as he passed out for a few hours until Patton would inevitably knock on his door for breakfast. Patton had been an angel about it too, always preparing extra coffee for the sleepy side until he felt almost alive again.

Roman frowned and Virgil immediately recognized the look of doubt that overtook his features. Roman placed a hand on Virgil’s shoulder and the anxious side could feel the barest warmth radiating from the touch even through the multiple layers of fabric he was wearing. If that wasn’t enough, the prince used his other hand to touch two fingers gently under Virgil’s chin, tipping his gaze up until Virgil could see nothing but deep amber eyes staring back into his own.

“Your eyes are heavily irritated, like Logan’s when he’s spent the whole night researching on his computer,” Roman said, tilting his head slightly and leaning in closer as if to get a better look.

Virgil could hear the accusation in the comparison.

“You’ve been on tumblr again, haven’t you?” Roman asked, a smirk tugging the corner of his lips as he caught Virgil’s hand in the proverbial cookie jar. “What is it, side ship blogs?”

“...they call them logicallity…” Virgil mumbled, his shoulders scrunching and back curling as he buried himself further into his hoodie.

Roman pulled his hands back from Virgil as one flew immediately over his mouth, covering the grin that Virgil was certain was on the prince’s face from the way the skin around his eyes crinkled with delight. A long, moment of silence passed between the two as Virgil now occupied Roman’s former seat in a balled up heap of shame and Roman stood over him, unmoving with eyes twinkling like playful flames.

Then the prince broke.

An undignified snort erupted from him and Roman bent at the waist as a stream of musical giggles steadily flowed. It was beautiful to hear and under other circumstances, Virgil was certain he would have laughed along from the sound alone. At the moment though? He just felt shame. Virgil pulled his legs in and tucked his shoe-covered feet underneath himself, no longer giving a damn about the prince’s upholstery. Now he almost hoped there was stray mud or gunk on his shoes he could get on the stupid, overly extra seat.

“Oh Virge no!” Roman cried and immediately dropped to the floor on his knees, bringing himself just under eye-level to the anxious side. The prince reached out and laid his hand against Virgil’s leg, rubbing his thumb in little circles over the kneecap.

“You were laughing at me,” Virgil accused moodily with the smallest of pouts protruding out his lower lip, a move he would forever deny.

“You’re right and I- I’m sorry stormcloud,” Roman said, as his smile only grew. “It’s just that... it was so... _unbearably-_ ”

“Stupid?” Virgil muttered, breaking eye contact to stare at the floor. Virgil leaned his cheek against one of his knees. He could feel bile creeping up in his throat as his mind was already supplying the prince’s agreement.

“ _No,_ ” Roman insisted, reaching up to push some of the hair Virgil was hiding behind, out of his face.

Virgil felt himself flinch at the contact, but didn’t respond as clever fingers began to card their way through his hair. It felt nice, but with the way Virgil could still hear his heart was still pumping in his ears, he wasn’t able to fully enjoy it. Roman’s laugh always had mixed associations for the anxious side. It wasn’t that he _didn’t_ want Roman to laugh. In fact, there were few things that could lift his mood the way the sound of the joyous prince could. It was like Patton’s surprise hugs and Logan’s quiet checkups. Just, little things he associated with his famILY.

Still though...

There was a time that laugh sounded cruel.

Yet, knowing he had that association only caused Virgil to feel more guilt. It didn’t feel _fair_ to have those feelings anymore. They were supposed to have moved past that. Roman had already apologized. Hell, Virgil had never really been angry at the prince anyway. At the time, the anxious side felt he deserved the scorn. The others coming after him had been a surprise and since then, all of the light sides have gone out of their way to make him feel welcomed and listened to.

There had even been a part of him that enjoyed the back and forth that him and Roman had. Times that it was almost a little fun, a little like teasing. He missed it, a little, sometimes. However, Roman had somewhat tiptoed around subjects with him more recently. Lately, it seemed the only way Virgil could pull out his sarcasm was by watching the prince’s favorite movies, so Virgil tried to indulge him whenever Roman asked. The last thing Virgil wanted was to have Roman feeling as if he had to baby him. Yet, here he was, panicking over something so stupid as Roman laughing.

So what if it was because he was an idiot?

“Virgil, it’s just that it was so very cute of you.”

What?

“What?” Virgil asked, he tried to reach for something else to say, but it was as if his mind was suddenly wiped clean.

“It’s very... _endearing_ that you want to believe so much in love. Plus, there is nothing so noble as trying so hard to help a friend,” Roman declared with his most dazzling smile before pushing off the ground to stand, shoulders back and proud. He reached out a hand toward Virgil and asked, “So, what’s the plan then?”

“Plan?” Virgil asked, hesitantly giving his own hand over to the prince.

Roman secured their grip, and tugged, helping Virgil up from his crouched position on the chaise.

“If you believe so ardently in Logan’s feelings, then I do too,” Roman said, as if it were a fact as obvious as the green of the grass or Patton’s love for cookies. “So, how are we going to give the resident nerd the opportunity to express them?”

* * *

The day of the planetarium visit came fast, faster than Virgil would have preferred. He would have liked a little more time for planning, Logan finding out could backfire the whole plan after all. They had to keep it secret. Roman was officially in charge of keeping the logical side busy while Virgil readied Patton. That’s how the anxious side found himself outside the cyan door after hitting it with two sharp knocks. He could hear shuffling inside after a moment and began picking at a loose string on his hoodie as he waited. He wasn’t nervous of course.

Absolutely _not_ at all.

It was just Patton.

…

This was a terrible idea wasn’t it?

Virgil’s breaths came in slightly ragged as he started to think of all of the ways his plan could go wrong. _Would_ go wrong. Patton and Logan would find out and it would be ruined. They would see what he was doing and they’d think he was manipulating them or something. Then they’d hate him. He’d lose his famILY. He’d lose _Thomas_. He’d be banned from the lightsides and cast off without even Janus and Remus there to keep him company. He would be-

“Virgil! Kiddo, are you okay?” Patton’s big sky blue eyes watered as his hands hovered just above Virgil’s shoulders, ready to steady him should he need it, but holding off from quite touching him incase he was opposed. Virgil swallowed and his heart felt heavy at the sight. He hadn’t even noticed the door open. Yet here was the moral side, holding out an olive branch of comfort for Virgil to take or refuse freely.

Patton tried so hard for him. In the beginning the fatherly figure tried rushing him with hugs and went through a lot of emotional distress when it became clear that unexpected hugs could worsen the panic attack rather than help it. That kind of physical affection was almost instinctual for the emotional side, especially in response to another’s distress. Virgil could still recall the broken clarity that came over Patton’s face when he realized his best intentions were causing damage rather than good for the anxious side. Still though, Patton had worked hard in finding alternative ways to help. The hovering became a silent question between them, a gesture that Patton poured his love into and Virgil was free to accept or deny the physical aspect of it without guilt, knowing still that the gesture was one that intended care.

Virgil reached for Patton’s still hands and pulled them down onto his shoulders and the fatherly side wasted no time in maneuvering himself to wrap Virgil in a hug. Patton hugs were wonderful things when he was ready for them. It was like being wrapped in a freshly dried blanket or eating a warm and gooey chocolate chip cookie. Patton’s hugs were always cozy and soft. He smelled heavily of baked goods and birthday cake, yet there was always a pleasant hint of that clean, flowery smell of something freshly washed lingering around him. He smelled like safety and goodness and _home._ It was as if just his existence, his presence in a room, could make everything in the vicinity feel like home sometimes.

“Shhhh, hey, hey kiddo, it’s okay,” Patton said gently as he ran one hand against his spine, from the base of his neck to just above the dip in his back, up and down and up and down. “You finally here to talk?”

What?

Oh shit.

“Talk?” Virgil asked, feigning innocence. “Talk about what?”

“You know, the nightmares you’ve been having. Don’t think I haven’t noticed the bags under your eyes again, you look exhausted kiddo.”

Virgil let out the breath he accidently held in his internal panic, sighing in relief.

Oh thank Thomas.

Patton seemed to take the sigh as a sign of hesitancy however and gave Virgil a worried look as he pulled the purple side in for an even tighter hug.

“It’s okay Virgil, I promise I’m here for you kiddo,” Patton said, nuzzling his forehead into Virgil’s hair playfully. “Whatever it is you can tell me. I wanna be able to help you, ya know?”

Virgil blinked and looked up into the big cyan eyes staring back down at him with nothing but honest adoration.

He had been given an opportunity.

A pang of guilt ran through him at the thought of using it however. He did say _whatever_ though. Plus, was it really manipulation if it was on his behalf?

Virgil chewed on his lip, not particularly liking the way his inner monologue had begun to sound a bit too much like a certain snake. However, Logan and Patton had both done so much for him since he emerged from the darksides. He wanted to do something for them. He wanted to be able to help them for once, to do something _good_. This... this was good right? Roman had seemed to think so. The prince had so quickly believed in him. Was he betraying that faith? Would Roman be disappointed in him? Would they all be angry at him?

_It’s not as if they’ll ever have to know._

At that Virgil internally groaned. Now _that_ voice in particular sounded exactly like Janus. He was just beginning to question the entire plan when he thought of Roman, who was already braving the struggle of distracting Logan for him. He thought of what Remus had told him, of Logan and him specifically working on making the imagination as realistic as possible to help him have a place to calm down after nightmares. Hell, he even thought of Janus and the way the snake side in the stupid-looking crocheted clothes and the way he and Patton had been getting along so well recently. Maybe... maybe even what he said wasn’t _all_ bad.

This was their _chance._ So he should take it while he can right?

“In... in that case Pat,” Virgil started, pulling away from Patton’s grip with a cough to clear some of the nervousness from his tone. “Would, uh... would you be willing to be my canvas for the day? I’m still a nervous about the ride and I thought maybe working my distract me?”

“Of course!” Patton exclaimed, taking Virgil’s hands in his own and bouncing on the balls of his feet. “Can it be a bit subtle though? I wanna be able to blend in when we get to the planetarium. How would I see the sights after all if all of the patrons are too busy crowding to see your art?”

Virgil felt his cheeks warm at the compliment and pulled his hood up, shrugging into it a bit. “I-I can do that.”

Patton only brightened further and immediately dragged Virgil into his room.

“What do I do?”

“You should probably start with a shower. I think Thomas will be leaving by the time you're done anyway.”

“Can do!” Patton exclaimed with one more excited hop, before turning back to Virgil with a concerned look. “Are... are you going to be okay in here? The last time you were in here for a while it didn’t go so well.”

“Yeah, I’ll be fine. I can block out the effects better without Thomas here amplifying it. Plus, I know what to expect now.”

“If you’re sure...”

“I am Pat, I’ll be fine. I promise,” Virgil said, patting the moral side on the side of his arm fondly. “If I need to I’ll wait in the hall, but I don’t think I will.”

Patton nodded, and gave him one last quick, affectionate squeeze before skipping his way to the room’s private bathroom. Virgil smiled after him, wondering how someone so childlike at heart could be such an adult sometimes. He shook the thought out of his head, resigning himself to the wait. Just as he started to lay back on Patton’s bed to try and relax for a bit, he felt some kind of boiling fluid bleed through the fabric of his jeans to scorch the skin of his lap.

“ _WHAT THE FU-”_ Virgil started, before a pillow was shoved over his face.

“Shhhh! Are you _trying_ to make Patton run back in here?” A familiar, snarky voice said above him.

Virgil pushed the pillow off of him enough to see Janus grinning down at him, with a smirk particularly pulling up on the snake side of his face. He immediately shoved him off, but Janus seemed unperturbed as he simply settled back to sit at the edge of the bed as Virgil re-acclimated himself.

“Janus, you have until the count of five to explain-” Virgil said holding up a hand with his five fingers wiggling showingly. “What in the ACTUAL fuck?”

“I’m here to _spill the tea,_ ” Janus explained, gesturing to the empty mug in his hand as he looked far too pleased with himself at his own joke. “You’ve been lying an awful lot recently Virge, did you really think I wouldn’t notice?”

Virgil outwardly groaned, both at the terrible joke and the accusation. In fact, the whole situation was just awful and Patton’s room should just swallow him now and bury him into one of the memory books strewn about.

“Too much?” Janus asked, tilting his head to the side before he snapped his fingers to will away the still-burning tea. Virgil felt instant relief. Thankfully his legs weren’t really burned per say, more like the skin was a little irritated. The angry red marks would fade quickly now the liquid was gone.

“Ya think?” Virgil asked, kicking off his shoes so he could pull his knees to his chest without worrying about getting Patton’s bedspread dirty. “Now what do you want?”

“I _didn’t_ already say Virgy, I’m _not_ here to find out why you’ve been lying so much.”

“Well, you can go then. It’ll stop after today.”

“So, it’s got something to do with your bet with Logan then?”

“No,” Virgil said, glaring at the snake, who just scooted closer to him in his interest.

Janus’ teeth pulled into a wider grin and Virgil could see he’d been caught in his lie.

“Okay, yes. Sort of, but not really,” Virgil admitted. “Look, it’s got nothing to do with you.”

“So what _does_ it have to do with then?” Janus asked, eyes bright.

“Nothing.”

“Liar.”

“I mean it.”

“ _Sure Jan._ ”

“I should be saying that to you dumbass.”

Janus didn’t look at all deterred as he just shimmied his shoulders in delight. “Come _onnnn_ you know you _can’t_ trust me Virge, I _alwayssss_ tell ssecretssss.”

Virgil rolled his eyes and let out a huff. “If I tell you, will you leave me alone? Patton’s gonna be out soon.”

“Absolutely _not,_ ” Janus declared and Virgil wasn’t even sure if he was supposed to read that statement as a lie or truth, but the possibility of him leaving was still better than the absolute of him staying.

“Look, I think I have proof that Logan has feelings for Patton,” Virgil said in a hush after a quick check at the bedroom and bathroom doors to make sure they were still fully latched. “I’m just... helping them.”

“You’re setting Patton up with the _ner-?!”_

 _“Shhhh!_ ” Virgil declared this time, shoving his hand over the snake’s mouth. However, when he felt moisture on his palm he quickly pulled it away. “Did you just _lick_ me?!”

Janus blepped his long snake tongue with a pleased grin on his face. “Awwwww, look at my little spiderling, all grown up and manipulating people!”

“That’s not what’s happening here!” Virgil declared, glaring at the still-too-pleased snake face.

“Of _course_ it isn’t Virgey,” Janus said, dramatically winking, the stupid slimy smirk still present on his stupid face.

“Don’t call me that!”

“What? Virgey?”

“Yes, that!”

“Awww, but Virgey-”

They both went silent and looked up as a knock came to the door and Virgil found himself groaning again.

What _now?_

Janus seemed to take the hint however because when Virgil was just about to turn and to tell him to get lost but true to his non-word the snake was already gone. Virgil stood to answer the door, checking again to ensure the bathroom still hadn’t opened. Janus had just left and Roman was supposed to be distracting Logan. However, he couldn’t imagine what Remus would be knocking on Patton’s door for, so he wasn’t at all certain what to expect at the door as he pulled it open, enough to see through, but not so much he couldn’t block the entrance with his own person.

“Virgil?” A serious voice asked immediately and Virgil could have started banging his head on the doorframe right then. So much for Roman distracting him. It’d been, what? Twenty minutes?

“Hey Logan... what’s up?” Virgil asked.

“The ceiling of course,” Logan replied automatically.

Virgil stayed silent for a moment, letting him process through the statement. They’ve been working on it.

“Wait, you mean that in greeting,” Logan stated, pulling out his flashcards and browsing through them as he re-read the meaning. “Right, well I am currently looking for Patton. You see, I have found Roman’s most recent behavior today to be odd in his mannerisms and I wanted to consult Patton for any insight he might have on the matter since I believe it is emotionally based.”

“Odd how?” Virgil asked, swearing that Roman was never allowed to brag about his acting ability again without hearing about this in return.

“Well, he asked me to overlook some of his work which is not untypical. However, he came with a massive pile of works in progress, which is something he’s never done before. Usually Roman will not allow me to see anything he’s working on until he considers it at least a polished first draft.”

“Maybe he’s just trying to get a different perspective?” Virgil asked, leaning against the doorway. He hoped it looked casual because he wasn’t certain he’d be able to hold his own weight much longer in his own internal panic.

“Virgil, I am not certain you understand the severity of the situation,” Logan said with a sigh. “Roman has absolutely overrun my room with several years worth of unfinished ideas. More than I could realistically help him with any time soon. I was only able to slip away as he apparently went to grab even more to create further chaos in my space.”

“It sounds as if he’s just excited,” Virgil supplied with a weak half smile, hoping Logan bought it.

“More like delusional,” Logan started with a snort as he crossed his arms. “So about Patton...”

“He’s busy in the shower right now,” Virgil said, holding back a smile as the barest of blushes dusted across Logan’s cheeks. It was so faint, you would have to be distinctly looking for it to notice it at all. Virgil however, _knew_ Logan and _was_ looking. “To get ready for the trip.”

Logan’s eyes widened marginally behind his glasses and he lifted his hand to check over his watch, one that told everything from the time, to the day, to even the phases of the moon. “I suppose that is today, isn’t it?”

Virgil nodded and let himself smile at the excited grin that overcame Logan’s features. His eyes were almost _sparkling_. “I’m helping him get ready... ya know as a distraction?”

“You are employing some of the healthy coping mechanisms that we had discussed then?” Logan asked, the excited giddiness still coloring his tone.

“Course Lo, it’s a good idea. I think it’ll help. Plus, Patton’s excited about it too.”

Logan truly looked over the moon at every part of that statement. Apparently being told he was helpful and the prospect of a happy Patton were too much for even the logical side to resist because the next words out his mouth were, “Well, may I join you both? I am certain Roman’s dilemma can wait until we return this evening.”

Oh _no._

Abort. Abort! ABORT!

Virgil immediately looked toward the bathroom door, confirming Patton still hadn’t emerged thankfully, knowing that the easygoing, emotional side would have immediately agreed. It would ruin Virgil’s surprise though dammit!

A blessed distraction prevented Virgil from answering immediately to the anxious side’s relief. The two sides turned as footsteps sounded down the hall, becoming increasingly louder. Virgil hoped to hope that Roman had already noticed Logan’s absence and had come to save him before the entire plan was destroyed.

It was not the case however, as Remus turned the corner looking even more ragged than usual. His clothes were torn to hell and he had various splotches of mud and... was that blood?...covering him as he trekked through the hall without a care. Remus returned their glances with a slightly manic grin of his own, seemingly taking in the scene of the two sides at Patton’s door who were distinctly _not_ Patton. Virgil turned to him with pleading eyes, trying to subtly direct his gaze to Logan, willing the creative side to understand.

Remus blinked once, looking between the two before grinning even wider, with an almost evil look that could practically split his face. He moved into a kneeling pose like an American football player posing to start the round. Then he was off, barreling down the hall towards them at high speed, faster than Virgil even realized the brutish twin could run. Had Remus been _letting_ him win in all of those years of chase in the subconscious? He was supposed to be the fastest as the literal _embodiment_ fight or flight. Virgil pushed that thought away as he watched Remus curl his upper body and dip down as he reached Logan, promptly throwing the logical side over his shoulder in one fluid motion without even slowing down. Logan yelped and his glasses went askew, but he immediately held on for dear life as Remus sprinted the two of them away.

“SORRY VIRGIN! GOTTA STEAL YOUR NERD FOR A WHILE!” Remus shouted quickly, just before the pair of them disappeared.

Huh.

He fucking owed Remus now.

Whelp.

“Hey Virge is everything okay?” Patton called through a now open bathroom door. He was fully clothed in his usual outfit sans the cat hoodie. However, he was still rubbing a towel against his hair at what appeared to be a second pass considering he was dressed. “I thought I heard a yell.”

“Uh... yeah. Everything’s fine. I was just a little surprised,” Virgil said, trying to hide the nervous undertone of his voice. It was _fine_ right? Logan could handle Remus... right? “I think me and Remus may have just made up though? Sorta?”

“Kiddo, that’s great! I know that’s been weighing on your mind recently,” Patton exclaimed and Virgil remembered the bright green crocheted garments Patton had been making for the creative twin. Did he finish them? Did he give them to him? Would Remus even wear something like that? There was so much recently happening that he’d never expected, that Virgil wasn’t sure exactly _what_ to expect out of anyone anymore.

“Yeah... I guess...” Virgil said, hugging one arm closer to himself. His relationship with the darksides was a bit of an uncomfortable subject, one that he’d been avoiding telling Patton and Roman. It was a long time before he even opened up to Logan about the subject. Virgil felt a pang of betrayal course through him as the burning idea of Logan telling the others his secrets rushed to the forefront of his anxious mind. It wasn’t the first time. Virgil was usually able to beat those thoughts away with a stick with the knowledge that Logan would _never_ betray him like that. Virgil _trusted_ Logan to not overstep his boundaries. What was far more likely was that he was just obvious. Not that, that possibility helped his nervous energy at all. Nor was the telling lurch of a car starting.

For a moment the two sides extended out their senses to confirm that Thomas was indeed beginning his trip, with Joan and Talyn in the car with him. His friends joining always helped in preventing Virgil from getting too overwhelmed with anxieties, however even their companionship wasn’t foolproof in the matter.

“So how do we get started?” Patton asked, cheerfully grabbing hold of Virgil’s wrist as he tugged him back into the room to a small Cherrywood desk that was absolutely covered in photos and other small memorabilia waiting to be decoupaged away.

The moral side shoved the materials to the far corner of the desk and pushed aside the plush covered papasan he usually kept in front of his desk to relax as he scrapbooked. He opted for summoning two cushy stools in a similar style instead that allowed them to sit up properly. At the same time Virgil summoned a variety of makeup pallets and nail polishes to the flat surface of the desk.

“We... should probably start with the nails and work on your face in between?” Virgil said, a little unsure.

“Sounds good kiddo!” Patton encouraged, immediately placing his hands on the table and pushing them toward the anxious side to handle. “Just let me know what you need me to do.”

“Will do,” Virgil mumbled, already summoning a small bowl and tiny scrub brush.

He set to work on cleaning each individual finger thoroughly, getting all of the little crevices that were sometimes passed over with normal handwashing. He tried to work fast though as the motion of the brush made Patton begin to fidget in his seat.

“It... it tickles?” Patton said, sounding not quite certain of how to describe the sensation. “I didn’t even know a person could _be_ ticklish on their fingers.”

Virgil just smirked and ran the brush over a spot he knew made Patton squirm, despite having already finished the step. Virgil grinned evilly as Patton lurched slightly, trying his best to stay in his seat. Seeing Virgil’s expression however made the fatherly side reply less-than-parentally, by sticking out his tongue.

With a snort Virgil moved on, drying the nails and then working away at the cuticles, pushing back the ones that were unobtrusive and cutting off the egregious ones. At this part, the fatherly side was able to calm back down, leaving the anxious side to his machinations without much complaint. Virgil however, should have known better than to believe Patton could both sit still and quiet for long without anything specific to do because on came the most dreaded part of doing another person’s beauty care. Small talk.

Goody.

“So, Virgil, how have you been sleeping recently?”

Virgil just gave Patton a flat look. It’s not as if Patton didn’t _know_ he wasn’t sleeping much. He just didn’t know _why_.

“It’s just... I’ve been worried about you Virge. Janus too. He said it was like when you were getting nightmares from spending too much ti-”

“Janus can go eat a toad,” Virgil said flatly and automatically, as if it was a response he’d given a hundred times before. Yet, he immediately wished he could take it back when he saw the fatherly figure flinch and look away. “No! I’m sorry- I didn’t... I didn’t mean it like that.”

“It’s okay Virgil...” Patton said, still not looking up to meet the anxious side’s desperate stare.

“I... I haven’t been sleeping well. But I will, soon. I just need to get through today.”

“Has this trip been getting to you that much? I’ve been worried about that since your attack the other day you know.”

“Patton, I’d... rather not talk about it right now,” Virgil said, not certain how to tell the moral side that it had less to do with the actual trip and everything to do with him.

A silence permeated the room as Virgil laid down the first layer of polish on the nails. He was thankful that the fatherly side was a little too uncomfortable to object to the flat black he was starting with. In the past, Patton typically gravitated toward the more pastel colors that needed an initial layer of white to backdrop instead.

“Hey, do you remember when we first started having movie nights together?” Virgil asked, when the guilt started to become overwhelming. He didn’t want to _upset_ Patton, that was in fact, the _opposite_ of what he was trying to do. As he talked, he pushed Patton backwards to lean against the desk slightly as he moved to get the moral side’s foundation on as the nails dried.

“Of course I do!” Patton said joyfully, until a cheeky smile overtook his face. “Me and Roman went to your room blankets at the ready. We gave you the onesie Roman made and asked you to join us. You cried.”

“Nope, I don’t think I remember that part,” Virgil said, smudging his hand over Patton’s face in a way that dug the heel of his palm against Patton’s mouth so he couldn’t retort. Yet, he could still see the emotional side’s mirth through his eyes.

“-then Roman started panic conjuring anything and everything vaguely comforting he could think of to try and help you calm down.”

“Then you started crying.”

“Then I started crying too!” Patton agreed readily. “Which only made Roman panic more.”

“I still have most of those stuffed animals in my closet somewhere.”

“Awwww!” Patton exclaimed, little stars forming in his eyes, a phenomena that had started shortly after Thomas started watching _Steven Universe_ the other sides informed him _._ He hadn’t been around the others quite yet.

“Then Logan showed up,” Virgil input, as he brushed on setting powder for the foundation with practiced quickness.

“That’s right! Then Logan showed up, cause Thomas was crying, but he didn’t know why he was crying and Logan was trying to figure out why.”

“Then you kidnapped him.”

“Does wrapping him in some of the extra blankets Roman conjured and carrying him to the living room really count as kidnapping?”

“It definitely does,” Virgil said with a snort, turning away so as not to breathe too hard on his hard work from laughing.

“Well, you know kiddo, if we hadn’t done that he would have been Lo- _gone._ ”

“That was terrible,” Virgil replied, laughing anyway. Patton always looked so proud of himself. “Though, he did accuse you of _Pat-_ tronizing him.”

“That’s true,” Patton said, somehow looking both amused by the pun and thoughtful at the same time. “I suppose I should be more _Pat-_ ient in the future.”

“Nah, I don’t quite think it’s that popstar,” Virgil said, settling back down to work on the nails once more. He got to work armed with a loose dual chrome polish that shifted between blue and purple that gave a space impression against the black. “Logan’s problem is that he wants to be both included and important ya know? He doesn’t think he can have both.”

“He _is_ important though and he’s always welcome to be included!” Patton defended, a frown overtaking his face at the subject. Virgil knew he’d have to reroute the conversation quickly or Patton would quickly ruin all of his the hard work he’s already done. “All we’ve wanted was to inclu-”

“Pat, he’s scared,” Virgil said simply, cutting off Patton before he worked himself up into crying. “I know scared. I live it. At the moment, he is too. We’ve talked about it some, though he usually deflects. Beyond that though, I hear him sometimes when his thoughts get too anxious.”

A look of horror overtook Patton’s features at the new information and Virgil worried he’d have to try and stop him from crying all over again.

“It’s like... he thinks if he indulges into what he enjoys, he’ll stop being taken seriously. Then if he doesn’t he’s cold and not welcome into the famILY.”

“But that’s not true!” Patton sputtered and Virgil had to forcibly hold his hand still as he worked on the shimmering polish because the emotional trait was practically vibrating in his distress. Virgil watched as wave of different emotions washed their way over the emotional side’s face, concern, horror, fragility, want, self-doubt, despondency, fear.

Well we couldn’t have that anymore.

“I know it’s not and you know it’s not, but we both know feelings don’t work like that.”

Patton nodded sagely, settling back down as his shoulders slumped in his seat. “So... what do we do?”

“I dunno, what do you do when someone you care about feels like they’re not good enough?”

“Make sure they know that they’re loved and accepted,” Patton mumbled out the words, trying to blink back the watery tears that have started to form at the corners of his eyes. He looked so much younger without his glasses, especially with the new layer of foundation evening out his skin, the lightly rosy blush on the apples of his cheeks made him look downright youthful. He looked hardly fatherly at all.

Then Patton sniffled.

Oh boy.

“Then that’s what we will do,” Virgil said squeezing Patton’s shoulder reassuringly, trying not to remember the fact that the logical side had just been whisked away by Remus. That was... a kind of support right? “We’ll do our best to make sure he knows he’s accepted, both when he’s serious and when he’s not. Okay?”

“O-okay,” Patton agreed, just barely able to choke back a sob.

The moral side hadn’t started crying yet, and Virgil would be damned if he let him start just as he was about to start on his eyeshadow. He had one of his pallets and a brush grouped in one hand as the other was still rubbing Patton’s shoulder comfortingly.

“Hey, hey, shhhhh,” Virgil said in a whisper, as he slowly pushed him back into position to apply makeup. “We’re gonna fix it right?”

“Y-yeah,” Patton agreed with a hiccup.

The rest of their prep session had gone over pretty well after Patton calmed back down. At least there were no more incidents of the makeup almost being ruined from tears or anything. They had moved on to more mundane subjects such as what Patton planned on baking next and what movie Virgil was going to pick during his turn. After a while though, they stopped talking as Patton let himself relax and just seemed to enjoy the process of having someone take care of him for once.

There were two setbacks though. The first was that Virgil’s plan to put constellations on his eyes went out the window when Patton requested subtly. So instead, Virgil went with a cyan to deep blue blended hue shift that barely reached over the eyelid with a silvery liner. It would be noticeable, but only draw attention if you were close, especially behind his glasses. The other struggle was the effectiveness of the foundation. He should have watered it down slightly before applying it, but he wanted to make sure there was a good base for the highlighter and blush he applied. The problem was, the foundation all but covered his freckles, the very feature Virgil wanted to most flaunt. You could just barely see them ghosting through the layer of makeup when looking closely. He tried a test swatch, seeing if he could use one of his pencils to draw them back artificially in their places, but he couldn’t get it to look quite right so that idea was quickly abandoned.

Virgil settled on leaving the freckles as mostly hidden to try and preserve the rest of his work as they had limited time left and the anxious side had to get ready himself. They couldn’t just wear their normal clothing when they were out.

Interacting in the real world was always sort of a strange experience for the sides. It was one thing when they were at home with people who knew about them. However, while they were out and about, dealing with real people could be weird. It was like they existed, but didn’t at the same time. It was ultimately the truth. Virgil remembered the first time he went to a vendor, he was able to go through the entire process of purchasing a hotdog and soda at a local play Roman insisted they see but when Virgil looked back, the cashier looked down at the money he handed her in a state of confusion.

It was always like that for them. They interacted, but were essentially overlooked as blank faces in the crowd. The exception to that though, was fans. Fans of theirs could seemingly register their presence without problem. Logan theorized that it probably had something to do with the fact that they were “more real” to people who knew of them and then locked himself away in his room for over a week researching any potential basis for it. He ended up in a rabbit hole of quantum mechanics and parallel planes of existence interacting with one another that none of the others really understood. He never seemed to come to a solid conclusion either. Instead, Patton inevitably dragged him out and forced him to take some time to eat and rest.

Since then though, their normal outfits were off limits during real world interaction outside of the house. They were too quickly and easily recognized. Virgil had it pretty easy, all he had to do was trade his hoodie for a plain black one. Patton always seemed delighted to have a reason to wear his pun shirts. Logan usually complained about his tie being banned, but would settle for a button up shirt and some slacks. Roman used the opportunity to wear whatever fashions seemed to be trending, not that Virgil could understand who he was getting runway ready for. The point was that people didn’t notice them, after all.

Things became a little more complicated when the other two started joining them. Janus had to extend extra energy and transform to hide his scales in addition to the outfit change. They had started mapping out private break points for the deceitful side to rest if he became overexerted, but he rarely allowed himself to leave early. Sometimes it seemed like he was trying to prove something. And Remus... well if Roman went high fashion, Remus went anti-fashion. Often he would dress as if he belonged in the middle of a mosh pit, but those were his more tame attires. The dreaded times were when he would wear the weirdest trends on the internet, like the time he went around in a dress that looked as if were made entirely of a giant fuzzy boa paired with heeled crocs. Even in their sorta existing, sorta not states, people noticed him that day as he turned heads.

It wasn’t unusual to see the darker creative side absolutely covered in feathers or glitter or glow sticks or whatever other attention seeking thing he could get his hands on whenever they went out. If something was out of the box and oftentimes, stupid as hell, Remus _had_ to have it. Janus never batted an eye at the behavior. Still, Virgil didn’t completely understand why Thomas let him get away with it when they were trying to go lowkey.

“Virgil, we almost done?” Patton asked, keeping his eyes dutifully closed and his hands propped up against the desk, giving Virgil easy access to work.

Virgil blinked as an idea hit. It _would_ come from the imaginative side, somehow someway wouldn’t it? God, the duke would be smug as hell if he ever found out.

“Yeah Pat, just had a bit of inspiration,” Virgil said with a grin. He really would have to thank Remus at some point, even if he was the weirdest source of ideas ever.

Virgil searched through his stash to find an old bottle from Halloween and got to work. It was subtle after all.

Technically.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Have this prinxiety dialogue I decided to cut:   
> \-----------------------------------------  
> Roman: You know, there are people who make ship blogs for us too.
> 
> Virgil: *oblivious in his focused state* Um... okay? What’s your point?
> 
> Roman: I... suppose I don’t have one.


End file.
